What defines a person’s beauty?

When I searched in the thesaurus, synonyms that stood out to me were “alluring”, “appealing”, “attractive”, “lovely”, “stunning”.

I began to wonder if I fall under any of these above-mentioned categories.

It did bring me back to a childhood memory though – One morning, while I was walking through a neighbour’s property (yes, we did these back then when there weren’t fences and gates everywhere) to get to a relative’s house with my cousin, we went past this young cow. She watched us walk by (I’m assuming willing us to stop to feed her something or for a pet) with the most beautiful eyes I have ever seen on a cow or on any animal (human included) till date. That beautiful shape and the long lashes that framed them were just breathtaking! We took a minute to admire her before we continued on our way. I remember mentioning this to my mom later in the day and explaining the whole scenario as was my nature. My mom stopped what she was doing immediately to splutter at me in confusion, “did you just say the cow was beautiful?” Years later she still sometimes questions my vision when I admire beauty in someone or something and never fails to remind me of this incident.

They say, “beauty is in the eye of the beholder” and maybe that is true here.

Which brings me to today’s post. First off, I will not be taking back my statement on the cow – that bovine was absolutely gorgeous! I don’t care who would like to tease me for this at a later date, I stand by my conviction!

Further to this, I have always seen beauty as something a person holds rather than what a person looks like. It isn’t about the vessel the soul inhabits but what that soul contains to me. The physical beauty is something that can change with time and knowledge, but the timeless beauty of a person’s character & personality holds no limit.

We’ve all been there, talking to an absolutely beautiful looking person and once we get to know them, we don’t think the same about them anymore. Our perception has visibly shifted.

So, getting back to beauty being in the eye of the beholder. Who do we blame when we fail to see the beauty within ourselves? When we look in the mirror and we don’t see how beautiful we are, instead we choose to focus on the flaws? Aren’t the beholder’s eyes the one to hold accountable here? Why is it so much easier to see beauty in another than in ourselves?

I struggle with this on most days. As I age, I see the changes in my person. Over the years, the wrinkles and the lines, the circles and the marks, the things we have termed as ugly for commercial gain. I refuse to age. Or at least I refuse to age with grace. But why?

These circles and lines are all a map to the life I have lived. They hold memories that cannot be replicated. They hold knowledge acquired through personal experiences. They hold a uniqueness that is individual to my person. Why do I find it so hard to admire that in me?

The world has made it so that we always need to find something that needs fixing in order to achieve true and real satisfaction. But if we see that perfection, that beauty that lies within, nothing needs to be fixed.

I’ve come to the conclusion that we just maybe need new glasses, and not a new face.

Here’s to being able to see a different face in the mirror today. To fixing our glasses (or contact lenses) instead. Here’s to holding our heads a little higher, our shoulders a little straighter, because you know what? You are beautiful!

Love always,

P.S. I am too 🙂